154                                HISTORY   OF
 

CHAPTER Vin.
 

In which the author and the reader, while repos¬
ing after the battle, fall into a very grave dis¬
course—after which is recorded the conduct of
Peter Stuyvesant after his victory.

Thanks to St. Nicholas, we have safely finish¬
ed this tremendous battle: let us sit down, my
worthy reader, and cool ourselves, for I am in a
prodigious sweat and agitation—Truly this fight¬
ing of battles is hot work! and if your great
commanders did but know what trouble they
give their historians, they would not have the
conscience to achieve so many horrible victories.
But methinks I hear my reader complain, that
throughout this boasted battle, there is not the
least slaughter, nor a single individual maimed,
if we except the unhappy Swede, who was shorn
of his queue by the trenchant blade of Peter
Stuyvesant; all which, he observes, is a great
outrage on probability, and highly injurious to
the interest of the narration.

This is certainly an objection of no little mo¬
ment, but it arises entirely from the obscurity
that envelops the remote periods of time, about
which I have undertaken to write. Thus, though