pages tagged lit ex Philowixian http://www.columbia.edu/cu/philo/tags/lit_ex/ Philowixian ikiwiki 2012-12-12T07:00:31Z The Tale of Tight-Roping Bill http://www.columbia.edu/cu/philo/phlog/2008/03/tale-of-tight-roping-bill/ 2008-03-06T14:27:00Z 2008-03-06T14:27:00Z <span>As delivered to the AJU Underground last week. Though each line has 10 syllables, I made no attempt at iambic pentameter...</span><br /><br />The Tale of Tight-Roping Bill<br />by Matt Rutta<br /><br />Under the big top, where the lions roar, <br />Where tumblers tumble, trapeze artists soar,<br />Where three giant rings span expansive floor,<br />Fan expectation of so much in store.<br /><br />Clowns a&rsquo;plenty emerge from their auto.<br />From whence do they come? Where is their grotto?<br />The kids have balloons, parents are blotto.<br />All hush up as revealed is the motto:<br /><br />&ldquo;The greatest show on earth&rdquo;, it has been billed.<br />They&rsquo;re performing stunts that can get them killed.<br />Beyond capacity the tent is filled, <br />Sitting on bleachers where beer has been spilled.<br /><br />The jugglers juggle torches of flame,<br />But for the patrons it&rsquo;s more of the same,<br />For only one man has truly earned fame:<br />They want tight-roping Bill, that is his name!<br /><br />For they all come to see the tightrope walker,<br />Famous, legendary, badass rocker,<br />Puts on quite a show for every gawker;<br />None of them know they&rsquo;re in for a shocker&hellip;<br /><br />From up high on the wire King Bill does reign,<br />Over the red tent which is his domain.<br />Going way up there is clearly insane,<br />But none of them know how suffers he pain.<br /><br />He shows off, betwixt his teeth clenched a knife.<br />Recently found out, unfaithful his wife.<br />Rather than live with this tension and strife,<br />Tight-roping Bill has despaired of his life.<br /><br />He couldn&rsquo;t exist, seeing her with him,<br />Wife, bearded lady, with Cannonball Jim.<br />Oh, how could she do this and be so dim&#x203D;<br />Could she see the outcome would be so grim&#x203D;<br /><br />Quite a surprise that this short man in tights<br />Who conquered rafters, who basks in spotlights<br />Defied gravity to many delights<br />Was deathly, mortally, afraid of heights.<br /><br />Ascending the ladder, climbs resolute,<br />He conquered his fear, he gave it the boot.<br />The only thing on his mind is acute:<br />The time has arrived to settle dispute.<br /><br />Then Bill takes on his nefarious role,<br />To accomplish now his sinister goal.<br />He must pull it off, no matter the toll:<br />The adulterer shall pay with his soul!<br /><br />Early that day, rigs with no abandon,<br />Calibrates human cannonball&rsquo;s cannon,<br />Directed toward the lion&rsquo;s den, slammin&rsquo;;<br />The giant cat will eat Jim like salmon!<br /><br />The scum of the earth and the tasteless swill,<br />All stand in awe of our villain named Bill. <br />Unbeknownst to them, oh, indeed he will<br />Be on the verge of dramatic self-kill.<br /><br />He leapt from his platform to the trapeze.<br />He kicked the acrobat right in the knees.<br />Hijacking the bar, the criminal flees,<br />Swooping downward with the greatest of ease.<br /><br />Removes knife from his mouth, he cuts the string<br />Causing elements of his trap to spring,<br />Releasing the lock of the caged being,<br />The cannon&rsquo;s fuse pulled, toward jungle&rsquo;s king.<br /><br />All could be said, he descended with grace.<br />No look of horror emoted his face.<br />Frozen in time, he transcends time and space<br />By scarring the lives of all in this place.<br /><br />Intentionally, he misses the mat.<br />Tightrope Bill hits the floor with a loud splat.<br />Cannonball Jim is launched in seconds flat<br />And proceeds to be devoured by the big cat.<br /><br />As Hobo Murray gets hit with a pie,<br />His painted-on clown smile seems quite awry<br />For he needs to wipe off each tear-filled eye<br />As, watching dumbfounded, his best friends die.<br /><br />It&rsquo;s far bigger than the bloodiest mess,<br />Mem&rsquo;ry of this psychological stress<br />Of hubby and paramour deaths transgress<br />On Mrs. Bill, Bearded Lady&rsquo;s distress.<br /><br />Even years later, it makes us fall ill,<br />Those present that night still feel quite a chill<br />But never forget, for there is a thrill <br />Telling the tale of tight-roping Bill. it's a lit ex in a blog! http://www.columbia.edu/cu/philo/phlog/2008/01/its-lit-ex-in-blog/ 2008-01-21T23:50:00Z 2008-01-21T23:50:00Z one of our favorite and most enjoyable aspects of our weekly meetings is the literary exercise.<br />and so: i am proud to present one of our most favorite lit exes as preserved in the glorious tubes!<br /><br />http://andymasteroffish.com/marketingforsolutions.html<br /><br />enjoy.