Ghazal 194, Verse 1

{194,1}

tapish se merii vaqf-e kashmakash har taar-e bistar hai
miraa sar ranj-e baalii;N hai miraa tan baar-e bistar hai

1) through my heat/agitation, every thread of the bedding is a legacy/permanency of tension/struggle
2) my head is a trouble to the pillow, my body is a burden to the bedding

Notes:

tapish : 'Heat, warmth; distress (esp. that caused by heat); affliction; agitation; palpitation'. (Platts p.309)

 

vaqf : 'Standing, stopping, staying, halting, waiting; pausing (over); being intent (upon), endeavouring fully to understand; --bequeathing for pious purposes; tranquillity; firmness; constancy; permanency... --a bequest or legacy for pious purposes, a religious or charitable endowment'. (Platts p.1197)

Nazm:

From my writhing every thread of the bedding is in distress; my head is a torment for the pillow, my body is a mortal disaster to the bedding. (217)

== Nazm page 217

Bekhud Dihlavi:

He says, from my writhing every single thread of the bedsheet has become involved in distress; with regard to the pillow, my head has become a torment, and my body has become a disaster for the bedding. (277)

Bekhud Mohani:

That is, I writhe so much that in the bedding nothing but wrinkles upon wrinkles have begun to be seen; neither does my pillow have stability in one place, nor does my bedding. (382)

FWP:

SETS

My bedding has suffered sorely from the 'heat' and 'agitation' of my bad nights: I've twisted and pummelled it and beaten it into submission. The 'legacy' of those nights is thus the dire condition of the bedding-- the bedding has been so maltreated that it can no longer even do its job; it finds my head a 'trouble' and my body a 'burden'. The verse is very simple in its meaning, but it has a penumbra of implications:

=If the bedding itself can't, even at second hand, endure my heat/agitation, how much more intolerable must my own condition be!

=My condition is utterly solitary and helpless: not only do I not have the beloved to brighten my nights, I don't even have a friend or companion, so that only the state of my bedding remains to testify to my suffering.

=In my madness, my wretchedness is such that I project it even onto the bedclothes: nobody loves me, everybody hates me, even the bedding finds my company a source of suffering.

Compare the very different attitude of the bedding toward the lover in the next verse, {194,2}. Another verse that even more oddly combines a vaqf and bedding: {15,11}.