things to do

i am occasionally strongly motivated and then struck with ennui, indecision, and down down.
but when up for keeping going, this is where the going is going. and some of this is actually getting done:

I. learn new words. it is honestly entertaining. but the difficulty is that in all my years, i have never learned how my brain best learns new stuff when it has to learn and not when it wants to (e.g. my berkeley record). i really don't know how to train myself. but i think it's a worthy challenge to right the injustice that was my near-perfect math score and near middling verbal, when all these years it's been the math that has been the nemesis (granted, gre math is for junior high students). any ideas for good word books?

II. personal statement. do it.

III. NSF fellowship application. bulletproof. make admission undeniable.

IV. reinvigorate ancient berkeley thesis work, submit it, and along the way reawaken my intellectual curiosity, back to where i feel my will to power.

V. apply. early.

X. decide what i care about, if anything.