Resolutions '06

This appears to be the time when everyone is writing lists of resolutions for the New Year. It seems to me that these resolutions always have something to do with diet or fitness, and usually culminate in twenty dollars wasted each month on an unused gym membership. I'm not of the dieting disposition, as you well may know, but I still have certain goals that I'd like to accomplish. So, here is my list of resolutions for the year 2006 (this is not counting the perpetual resolutions to eat more fruit, get a PhD, and floss).

1. Gain moderate familiarity with Perl and Lisp. (I am going to aim low on this one).

2. Learn to speak and write English more gooder. Seriously though, I always felt that an Engineering degree is not a sufficient excuse for atrocious grammar. And it has always been my fantasy to have impeccable English grammar. I just never had the time to work on it. So, this year, I resolve to make a significant improvement in my composition and rhetoric.

3. Spend more time listening to the classics, like Mozart, Mendelssohn, and Motorhead.

4. Improve my technical writing, mostly by decreasing the number of Monty Python references that creep up in my documentation. A lot of people were very confused by that "LTO robots are very much like a good shrubbery" bit in my last upgrade document.

5. Finally write that fan letter to Henry Rollins, telling him that even though listening to Black Flag usually gives me a headache, he is still extremely cool. Possibly send him some fruit.

6. Support the fascist Hallmark empire by promptly sending everyone cards for birthdays, anniversaries, and major holidays.

7. Come to terms with the fact that the Dodgers are never coming back to Brooklyn. Just let it go. Also, finally quit harboring resentment for something that happened 23 years before I was born. Sniff.

8. And of course, spread good will and merriment wherever I go.