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From the Rock Issue (Sept 2000):
Crack Rock Smoother than PCP Ah, the Flex Account. To a young man just out of high school, used to spending his own hard-earned cash for his groceries, sodas, and beer, it seems like the magical red strip on the back of my CUID can get me just about everything. Everything, that is, except what I want most: crack and prostitutes. Prostitutes are not so much of a problem. Once crack is available on the Flex Account, it should be easy to find loose women willing to trade their affections for a puff on the rock. And besides, there are seven women for every three men on this campus. To women faced with that kind of ratio, crack addiction is a minor personality flaw. But the unwillingness of the Columbia University Administration to include cheap laboratory-made cocaine alternatives on the menus of Cafe 212, Ferris Booth, or at least JJ's Place (come on, like anyone goes down there anyway) is nothing less than a blatant disrespect to anyone faced with the unappealing prospect of supporting a $5000-per-week habit with work-study money. Now let me clarify, for the sake of my now-unlikely future
political career, that I have never smoked crack and that the only person
I know who has ever smoked crack will be appearing on Court TV this
October. Really. But this does not make me any less outraged, not just
on behalf of the established crackheads paying $32,000 a year of otherwise
disposable income to attend this institution but also for the rest of us,
who are just itching to find out if this crack thing is all it's made out
to be. This is why right-thinking and politically active students from all
walks of Columbia life have banded together to form C32, or the Campus
Crusade for Crack. You've probably seen our fliers. Our goal is to "Take
back the Crack". Come to our meeting next Sunday. We'll give you free
ice cream. And crack. |
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