 |
|
|
From the Rock Issue (Sept 2000):
THEY WATCH Who are They? They are the Them, the Them of They that make all the other Theys possible. They will control all if They have their way. They want you to buy Their drinks and wear Their clothes and marry the daughters of Their revolution. They Watch is your fighting chance. It is stationed on the parapet between us and Them, observing always and acting once in a while, if it doesn't have anything better to do. But They are cunning and clandestine, and many can slip into Their traps... 1. It's a back-pack, though not a complete back-pack. Is it European fashion sneaking across the pond, or an evil plot to make one of your arms weaker than the other? We think the latter. 2. Hey, look a faux-European style "open-air" market. Why is everything so expensive? I thought this was a peasant market? And how come if it opens so early I still can't get a decent egg sandwich, or any other breakfast food for that matter? And don't get me started on the fact that you can't buy their beer with your dining dollars. 3. So, you want us to believe that one day you just woke up and realized that you had Latino heritage? Certainly this had nothing to do with the recent popularity of Latin music, or your insatiable appetite for the green, you slut. Commodifying a history you know nothing about just to sell some records. Pathetic. No wonder you didn't get a fast food tie-in deal like everyone else. 4. What the hell are they doing on that huge island nation? No, not Australia. We already covered that. This one is even more of a mystery. First they misname their country, then they fail to produce a single thing for centuries. This stinks of conspiracy. 5. What looks debateably more foolish than a man in a suit on rollerblades? How about a man in suit riding a scooter that's sized for a six-year-old? Hey, even better, how about a whole country doing it? For a hundred bucks a pop, at that. Once they have our dignity, our free will can't be far behind. |
|
