"Once there was a was with well-trimmed whiskers who was whisked
away by the most evil wiz in the world. The wiz was actually a wus,
who wished his whiskers to be the best in the world (when they really
weren't...the was had better whisker). The wiz wanted to whomp on the
was' face to wipe away his whiskers until he could whisper no more.
The wiz whipped the was until there was no way he was going to walk again.
But the was had well-worked whiskers with way more power than the wiz had
guessed.
So the evil dude couldn't figure out how to get rid of the other dude's
moustache, and eventually just let him go free, and they more or less
lived happily ever after by sort of avoiding each other all the time."