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And I kept burying myself in the State Department study
and the Hazen study, you know, and the Stern study, and was
not at all enthusiastic about getting down to writing that proposal.
You know when I wrote that proposal? The day before.
And wrote it in a way that I was wishing that they would say,
“Look, this is not acceptable in a way, we can't put our money
into something like that.”
But they did. They put it in, and I was stuck.
Oh, I had another requirement which I thought they weren't
going to buy -- and this by way of trying to support my conscious
belief that I didn't want it, I didn't want to do it, that I wanted
to be left alone. I said, “OK, if we do this, we're not going to do
it within the framework of any academic institution”, because
the Social Dynamics Research Institute had taught me -- see, I
always learn my lessons late -- that I wasn't going to be bothered
with research bureaucracy and -- at the college or anywhere else.
I didn't want it. I didn't want that grant to come through
the Social Dynamics Research Institute, which it could easily have
done. I said, “What you folks have to do is set up an independent
operation, give me the freedom to express my Impossible administrative
ability, which is”-- I'm the world's worst administrator,
I guess because of impatience.
So, they bought that. You know. They got the lawyers to
set up an independent agency, to get within a matter of weeks tax-exempt
status. Well, when the did all that -- hell, there was
nothing for me to do except tender my resignation as director of the
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