Parental Advice Stump Speech

“What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.” - Rodney Dangerfeld, on the joys of fatherhood.

"If I were again beginning my studies, I would follow the advice of Plato and start with mathematics." - Galileo, on how not taking advice drove him to become a massive failure.

"You shouldn't let poets lie to you." - Bjork, on why you should buy a Danish book on television.

"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice." - Bill Cosby, on why his PR representative told him to cancel all of his upcoming interviews.

The Philolexian Society sneaks out of the window even though they're grounded and prepares to debate: R: Parental Advice Stump Speech Thursday, 11/20 at 8:30pm Hamilton 503 (What's a stump speech, you ask? A stump speech is where you draw a relevant resolution from a hat, and spin an impromptu speech for or against the prompt, depending on what you have drawn. Everyone's speech is just as messy and unprepared as yours!)

Announcements: PHYLERING is tonight at 7:10pm in the lobby of the Diana. As usual, there will be candy and phriends!

Also, New Member Night is coming! It'll take place on December 6th, so if you want to become a PHULL & ENGORGED PHILOLEXIAN(!!), be sure to show up and make your speeches now!

Surgam, Grandma Whip